Good friends accept us and…?
Sometimes when I wander around, doing nothing, I would think about things that recently happened around me: like, gossips that classmates told me, what I‘ve done that morning, or times that I spent with my friends, etc. And there are times that I suddenly found out I ‘ve behaved badly in front of my friends, without knowing it at the moment, maybe acting impolitely, speaking in a mean way, doing something stupid, etc. And then I got worried and thought “Will my good friends distance themselves from me, after seeing my misbehavior?” But a few seconds later I asked myself: “Wait– it is really me, right? It is true that there is something quite ugly in me, right? If it is true, why should I hide it from good friends, in order to save our friendship?” Yes, I don’t think we need to hide.
In my opinion, a good friend is one who knows you—both your goods and flaws, and still accepts you.
For example, a friend (good friend I mean) is one who knows (that) you are so hatefully proud but can still tolerate you.
A friend is one who knows (that) you like picking nose but doesn’t feel that you are disgusting. A friend is one who knows you enjoy teasing but still be with you, not irritated by your occasional mean words.
Let me repeat: A good friend is one who knows both your goods and flaws and still accepts you. If he doesn’t know you that much, you two can’t be called good friends. If, after he knows more about you, he distances himself from you, you won’t become good friends. It is not your fault—nor is it his, it is kind of fate.
So– friends are those who are always beside us and support us, right?
No, not exactly.
We usually think friends are those who always support us. But, do they support us no matter what we do?
If you need money and hesitate whether to rob a bank, should your good friend support you to rob the bank? If you enjoy swearing (saying bad words), should your good friend support you to swear at everyone that comes to you? Let’s take a more lifelike example: If you hurt somebody, do someone wrong, should your good friend appreciate what you’ve done, and tell you,
”My dear, that’s OK. You have done nothing wrong”? Should he?
I don’t think so. I believe under such situation a good friend will point out our misbehaviors, give us suggestions, and most importantly, he is not going to leave us.
Friends are those who accept what we are, but not (whose who) allow us to do anything with a blind eye.
Let’s talk about a famous movie, Good Will Hunting, many of you have seen that, right? The two main characters, Will and Chuckle, are good friends, working as construction workers together. Will is very talented in Maths, but he didn’t want to become a Mathematician, thinking that would bore his life. He enjoyed remaining as a workman, living just like his friends do. But as you may remember, when he told Chuckle this thought, Chuckle scolded him that he shouldn’t waste his talent and stay here, if he does so, it is an insult to his friends. You see, Chuckle didn’t “support” Will here. He didn’t support him to remain as a construction worker. He didn’t support him to ignore his talent. He didn’t support him to waste his life. He didn’t support him, because he is a true friend of his.
That is what friends mean to me.
You can’t demand to be friend with this guy or that, it can’t be forced. But, if you really meet somebody who is willing to be your friend even after knowing your shortcomings, please cherish him, for it is very lucky for you to meet a friend like that. They accept you, but not gratify you. They admire you, but not flatter you, they are FRIENDS.