As G. K. Chesterton, the great British poet once said, ‘One may understand the cosmos, but never the ego; the self is more distant than any star.’
Indeed, ever since we started to receive education, we have been paying most of our attention to the others instead of ourselves. Who came up with the theories of Mathematics, physics, or chemistry? Other people did. What about history? Those names, those stories we memorized? They are all about other people as well. Right now, you are listening to a stranger’s boring speech. So what about yourself? Have we ever tried to figure out who we are? Are we really familiar with ourselves?
As an ordinary eighteen-year-old girl, I am still trying to figure out my position in this world. These questions are too difficult for me to answer. Still, there is a childhood experience of mine that made me to possess a strong belief in discovering myself. Thank you for giving me this chance to share it with all of you.
Since I was born, my elder sister and I have shared love, blessings and basically everything we had together; except for her charm and intelligence. She was a pretty and sweet girl who gained compliments and praises everywhere. Moreover, she was smart and had an incredible talent in drawing. By contrast, I was so plain and ordinary that I thought no one would pay any attention to me. So it is a corny sister-issue for me which is surely followed by a corny, predictable result. Day by day, my stubbornness and inferiority took away my confidence and turned me into a quiet, shy and sad girl.
One day, again I was trying to imitate my sister’s drawings. No matter how desperately I tried, I was just unable to draw as well as my outstanding sister. Hating myself, I lost my temper and tore my drawing into pieces. Just then my mother came near me silently. Unbelievably, the next thing she did was trying to stick my shattered pieces of drawing together, and it made me burst into tears. She then told me, ‘It doesn’t matter whether you can be the best person in this world. The most important thing is to create the best of your own life.’
Right now at this moment, I can still remember this conversation. I guess somehow her words have made an amazing change inside me. I became eager to express myself, simply wishing to create the values and position that belong to me. I understood that I would be the only me in this world. So who cares how the others judge me? Who has the qualification to make comparisons anyway? Life is simply too short to be anyone but yourself!
As days go by, I still cannot defeat my sister’s drawing skills, which helps her to become an architect. And guess what? Even though she keeps emphasizing that she looks prettier, which I don’t really agree; I am definitely, with no doubts, taller than
her. And most importantly, I have been making my own choices of life. Majoring in law, applying for NTU, taking part in Toastmasters…I don’t know what these decisions will lead me to, and I can’t wait to find it out.
There is no doubt that everyone wants to have a happy and successful life, thus we look up to people with great contributions as our role models. In fact, comparing with this, discovering one-self requires much more time and is far more difficult, as the process of growing up continually reminds us of our platitude and littleness. Nevertheless, we should bear in mind that the first step to love and enjoy your life is to discover yourself, both good and bad sides. If you cannot find out who you are immediately, start from finding out who you are not then! Just live to the limits, create your own life as this is always your own choice! TME.